skweez!

Arrgh! Feels like all my blood and innards are going opposite directions. My doctor re-adjusted my binder so tight that it makes breathing a bit difficult. As for the benefits, I could easily getup and walk around because it gives the needed support on my lower abdomen. My doctor advised me to not take the binder off for tomorrow's 8-hour travel to my home province. When we get to the province, that's when I can take the binder and the gauze off.

The knot on my stitch was already removed. I was a bit terrified when, while changing the dressing of my wound, the doctor took out a pair of scissors. I wasn't warned for any pain today. I could only imagine the pain I went through more than two decades back, when the stitches on my finger was removed. It felt like being stitched again. But to my relief, this time, only the knot was removed. The thread that was used is absorbable.

Okay, that's all I could type for now. I need to lie down. I'm feeling a tight squeeze around my waist.

here we go

Checked in for the surgery tomorrow. I got to the hospital with my Mom. My Pops will follow after the color-coding for the day lifts at seven.

Overheard folks at the waiting area talking about pre-surgery jitters. "It's gonna be okay, they will give you a shot to calm you down before the operation," one of them told the other.

"I think I'm gonna need that too," I thought.

Although I'm a picture of strength, inside, my heart was staging a mardi gras. "Sheeeeet... they're going to open me up!" I was screaming in my head. Still, I managed to smile and talk confidently to the admission clerk.

When we got to the nurse station, they asked us who the patient is, as both my Mom and I looked okay. I said it was I. And then they asked for my age when they filled out my patient record/form. I said "30," and the nurses gave me a second look. They thought I was much younger, they said. I was flattered, but still scared.

A nurse ushered us to my room. And then I was told that I am no longer allowed to leave the room. So my Mom, went back to the apartment to fetch my Pops. Before they got back, a nurse took my blood pressure, and then a medtech took 5cc of my blood for tests. She had a little difficulty looking for a good vein. It was a painful extraction.

While I was alone, I continued to pray. Up to that time, I couldn't believe that I'm about to go through surgery. I was feeling like I was strapped into a roller coaster with a thousand loops, and there's no going anywhere but through it. Like I was pushed on a slippery slide, I couldn't do anything to stop my fall.

I tried to get my mind of it by reading books.

And then my parents arrived. And then another medtech entered my room and asked to extract another 5cc of my blood, saying the first sample was hemolyzed - about which my mother was wondering (she's a medtech too) because it's too soon for the red blood cells to rupture. The medtech couldn't find the vein on my other arm, so she extracted blood from my left wrist. (Ouch!)

Before 9PM, I had my dinner. I was told to eat a lot.

At 9PM I was given an enema. A few minutes after, I pooped out everything I ate. (Ew.)

I had a hard time sleeping.